A Compilition of Classic Rock Songs With a Plot to
by Thornton16
Summary: Fluttersh finds an amnesiac with a special talent in the forest and then stuff happens. I really didn't want to write this story but I kept subconciously developing the plot into a coherent story. Anyway please review.
1. Chapter 1

**I just realized my plot line is really similar to the Majestic, Oh Well.**

The sun was beginning to shake off the dust of the previous night and was painting the woods with a delicate golden hue. As the nocturnal creatures had since retired for the day and the light dwellers had yet to rise the world was deathly quiet. This brief still held a delicacy that was too easily disrupted and as a result the young man could be tromping through the forest a long way off and his profanities could be heard much farther off.

"Fuck 'um, fuck every last one of those numb plastic whores. They feigned emotion and developed there persona's for so long they don't know who the fuck they are. I barely know who the fuck I am."

He continued on like this for mile after mile through the forest hour after hour until the sun began to make its presence felt. He was undoubtedly lost but found that too be one of his lesser concerns.

"I might as well jump right off this cliff and be done with all the superficial bastards, let 'em guess what happened to me, of course then they'd all be at my funeral and I'd turn over in my grave."

He wasn't happy to continue his walk this way but he was content so he marched on quickly losing track of his surroundings, then he heard a rumble. Part of the cliff that was worn way came loose and he was sent tumbling down hill. He attempted to flap his wings and get air borne or at least slow the fall but something struck his head and he blacked out.

As the sun began to tickle the outskirts of town a pink manned Pegasus rose at her usual early hour to enjoy the solitude of her morning walk. This was Fluttershy's favorite time of morning, the calm quietness of nature at this hour was a good reflection of herself and her strolls served as a therapeutic prelude to a hectic day of tending to her animals. She walked to the edge of the Everfree forest which, though it would arouse her deepest apprehensions at any other hour, seem welcoming and amicable in the calm hours. She was nearing the end of walk enjoying the musical chirping of the early birds when another sound caught her ear .It was painful sounding grunts and moans a sound that would normally alarm her, but realizing some animal may be injured she instead decided to examine the noise. She made her way to a patch of thickets about 200 meters from a cliff side and to her surprise found that the sounds were coming from a pony. He was about average height and very sinewy, a Pegasus with a light blue coat that was somewhat silver and a dark blue mane that was somewhat black. He was sitting up and rubbing his head but appeared to be out of sorts for some reason. Having her better judgment over ridden by compassion she decided to inquire if he required assistance.

"Uhm a…are you okay"

Startled he jumped back at her words and she similarly recoiled to his reaction. She fell down and her face was almost fully concealed by her long pink mane prompting him to chuckle slightly and give a small grin.

"I hope I'm alright but it looks like I should be more concerned about you." He gave her his hoof which she took with much apprehension and helped her to her feet.

"What's your name?"

"I'm Flu..tt..er ..shy"

"I didn't catch that." She took a deep breath and with as much conviction as she could muster told him.

"I'm Fluttershy, what's your name." At this he gave a very puzzled almost disturbed look as if she had asked him some very odd question, she was about to repeat herself when he spoke up.

"Well as it turns out I've been trying to recall my name or anything about me for the past several minutes, all I can recall is hitting my head and waking up. I figure I have some kind of amnesia from the blow because I don't know who I am, where I'm from, what I do, or how I got here it's just blank. You wouldn't happen to recognize me would you?"

Actually his face was vaguely familiar but she couldn't place it so he was probably just someone she saw at flight camp.

"I'm sorry I don't know you."

"Shoot, I probably ought to get on trying to remember myself but I have no idea where to start or where to go."

Fluttershy was accustom to openly taking in sick and injured animals for a time until they recovered so she very unconsciously offered him a place to stay until he could remember who he was. It wasn't until immediately after that she realized what she had just said and wished deeply that she hadn't. He told her he couldn't ask her to do something like that, but fearing that it would cruel to rescind her offer she insisted and having nowhere else to go he accepted.

She had several questions for him as they made their way to her cottage and she asked most of them but being of a very introverted nature they were spaced out with several minutes in between.

"So can you remember anything from before you hit your head?"

"No events or anything about myself, but I remember a lot of books I've read songs I've listened to and movies I've seen and based on that I'm a rocker with dry intellectual tastes."

"Are you nice, I know it's a silly question but with all my animals I need to be sure?"

"Well I hope so, but even if I wasn't I've forgotten how to be the mean me."

"What should I call you if you don't remember your name?"

"How about Stills."

He likewise had questions for her but of a less serious nature.

"Where are you from?"

"Well uhm, I'm uh from uhm Cloudsdale."

"What do you?"

"I uh t..take care of the uh a…animals that live around here."

"What do you enjoy?"

"Well I uhm I love music and uh n…nature."

She had relaxed somewhat by the time they reached the front door but was still very nervous when they opened the door; she was never certain what reaction her animals would have to a stranger. Her nervousness was assuaged however when she saw the mainly positive reaction that her animals had towards Stills.

"I can't thank you enough for you hospitality, but I think I need to sleep I'm dog tired."

"Oh, well you can sleep on the couch for now."

"Thanks Fluttershy you're really a life saver, good night or good morning by now."

"Good night."

She began tending her animals with a strange little smile written on her face.

**I had no intention of writing this but the idea just kept nagging me and I pretty much have the whole ides mapped out. Stills is a reference to Steve Stills the great acoustic guitar player for Buffalo Springfield and Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young, and.**


	2. Chapter 2

**So here's chapter two**

Fluttershy woke at her usual hour the next morning and was preparing to go on her ritualistic walk around the forest edge when she found herself startle by an unexpected change. From down below she heard movement and smelled someone cooking. Her immediate response was that someone had broken in and was setting her house on fire but as she remembered the unusual guest that was staying with her. She reassured herself that it was only Stills and quietly tip toed down the stairs to her kitchen. As she got closer she herd that he was singing an unfamiliar song while he cooked that went like this.

_There is a house in New Orleans_

_They call the rising sun_

_And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy_

_And god I know I'm one_

_My mother was a tailor_

_She sewed…_

"H..hi"he turned and gave her a lopsided grin.

"Good morning, sorry the first thing you had to hear was my lousy singing."

"That's alright, say did you remember anything about yourself this morning"

"Not a thing, but I figure I'm an early riser and a mediocre chef." She took a look around her house and noticed that it appeared to be cleaned and that several of her pets had appeared to be fed.

"D…did you straighten up?"

"Well it was the least I could do, I hope you're hungry because I may have cooked a little too much." She thanked him for the meal and for his assistance and they sat down to eat. Half way through breakfast she remembered a question she had meant to ask him the night before but had forgotten.

"I hope you don't mind but could I maybe ask why you're so calm about losing your memory?"

"Well I suppose I've just forgotten my problems. Honestly I'm kind of excited about not remembering my life."

"Oh, but why would that make you excited?"

"Well because I'm probably just some boring pencil pusher no one care's about, but as long as I don't know I'm not. Technically I'm everything I ever wanted to be whatever that was a doctor a C.E.O. a rock star probably not a professional athlete though."

She giggled at his last remark and realized that whoever this young man was he was very intelligent which went well with his helpfulness and pretty blue eyes. She suddenly realized her last thought and went to work pretending it hadn't crossed her mind. He gave another small grin and it returned.

"If you'd like I could show you around town later today, I need to pick up food for my pets anyway."

"I would like that very much."

Then he started whistling a new song.

"Where did that cynical son of bitch get off to, he just stormed out of the building and didn't bother to come back. Does he have an idea how much we need him right now?"

The black unicorn with the white mane looked over at his partner a pinto colored Earth pony who was presently staring a tree and ostensibly conversing with a blue jay he was helping him track down their missing friend but was serving more as a liabilty.

"Ginger what the hell are you doing looking up tree's we're looking for clues not birds."

"Sorry Morri, I just figured since he's a Pegasus and all he might be in a tree."

"Your impossible, and don't call me Morri my name's Morrison."

"Whatever you say, hey where's Emerson and Entewhistle we were supposed to rendezvous around here."

"I don't know their even less reliable than you. There's only one person in this group I can count on and he's God knows where."

"We'll find him soon Morri."

He shot his partner a dirty look.

"Just shut up and look Ginger."

At that moment a red Pegasus with a yellow mane, Entewhistle, and a light orange Unicorn with a dark orange mane ,Emerson, came trotting up a break neck speed.

"There you two are, have you found McCready."

"No but we have found something we think you need to see."

The two bright colored ponies led the darker ones a goo half mile along the trail until they finally stopped at a spot where half the cliff side had given way.

**More musician references.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Things get a little more interesting**

"Are you ready to go?"

"Just one more minute I have to make sure I have everything my animals will need on the shopping list, they can get very upset if I forget something"

"It seems to me that they can be a lot of work to take care of."

"That's true but it's worth it when I know I've helped them or made them happy. Alright I think that's everything lets go."

They made their way to town at a leisurely pace stopping every once in a while so Fluttershy could point out important places in town or places in the park she particularly enjoyed. By the time they reached the town square more than an hour had passed since they left Fluttershy's home and she found herself surprisingly comfortable talking to this very near stranger. He didn't have much to offer to the conversation himself but he was content listening. It required several hours to purchase all the food and supplies that were necessary to care for her extensive collection of pets and at the end Stills was probably carrying 70 or more pounds on his back. His effort however was rewarded towards the end of their shopping trip when they a particular store. It was an older store with a hand painted sign in the window that read as follows: _Knopfler's fine guitars_ when he read this sign he set down his heavy load and rushed into the store without a word. Fluttershy was surprised by his sudden change in demeanor and proceeded to follow him in. After less than a minute she heard someone playing and followed the sound; when she reached it she found Stills had grabbed a cherry red and white Fender plugged it into an amp and was strumming very enthusiastically.

"Hey, I just remembered I know how to play guitar!"

"Well that's interesting. You sound good, what song is that you're playing?"

"It's called Wish list it's a song by Pearl Jam"

"How does it go?"

He cleared his throat and started singing

_I wish I was a neutron bomb, for once I could go off  
I wish I was a sacrifice but somehow still lived on  
I wish I was a sentimental ornament you hung on  
The Christmas tree, I wish I was the star that went on top  
I wish I was the evidence, I wish I was the grounds  
For 50 million hands upraised and open toward the sky_

She would have asked him to stop there but he sounded good and she remembered hearing that song a long time ago and wanted to remember the lyrics

_I wish I was a sailor with someone who waited for me  
I wish I was as fortunate, as fortunate as me  
I wish I was a messenger and all the news was good  
I wish I was the full moon shining off a Camaro's hood_

I wish I was an alien at home behind the sun  
I wish I was the souvenir you kept your house key on  
I wish I was the pedal brake that you depended on  
I wish I was the verb 'to trust' and never let you down

She did love that song.

"You're a good guitar player."

"Thanks, I can't for the life of me remember where I learned to play but I certainly love playing."

"I always wanted to learn to play an instrument when I was younger but my family didn't have much money for lessons and I was just one of quite a few kids so I didn't feel right asking."

Stills felt terrible sympathy for her. Being able to play music, to create something wonderful with your hands and mouth, to hear a symphony or a rock song and know what you're enjoying, was something everyone ought to have the chance to experience especially some pony as kind as Fluttershy.

"I don't know if I can play any other instruments, but if you'd care to learn I could teach you how to play guitar."

"I'd love to, but I couldn't ask you to do that."

"I couldn't ask you for a place stay and you still gave it to me."

"Well I s…sup…pose"

"Great first thing you need to do is find a guitar that feels god in your hooves."

She settled on an acoustic Epiphone that was similar to the one he learned to play on, another fact he had recently recalled.

"Alright first you ought to get acquainted with the strings. The big on the top is the lower E string, then the A, D, G, B, and higher e strings."

An hour or two later Fluttershy had learned a few chords and even a simple tune; they then picked up the groceries and carried them back along with two new items.

"Why did you buy the red Fender?"

"I needed something to play otherwise I would have gone crazy."

"Then why did you buy the bigger wooden guitar?"

"That's an acoustic, and you need something to learn on right."

"But you didn't need to buy it."

"Hey for all I know I'm a millionaire and I don't have 100 pets to care for."

She smiled

"103"

At that he laughed and flapped his wings floating the rest of the way back.


	4. Chapter 4

**Compilation of Rock Songs story, we update almost as frequently as Keith Richards blood type.**

"He's very nice, but has an interesting way about him. He's calm and collected but friendly and every time I see him he has a sort of sadness in his eyes but it's hard to spot."

Fluttershy was meeting her friends at their weekly spa outing and for the first time relating to them how she found Stills, his amnesia, and the various events that had transpired the preceding week.

"Are you a little nervous having a complete stranger, one you found just sitting in the forest, staying with you?"

"Well I suppose, but he doesn't know who he is and he's been really nice he even bought me a guitar."

"Doesn't that strike ya as a little odd sugar cube?"

"M..maybe he was just being nice."

"Or maybe he's a serial killer who had just escaped from prison and breaks guitars over people's heads."

"Pinkie Pie you don't need to scare her."

"No I know he's alright there's nothing wrong with him."

"You seem to think pretty well of someone you've only known for a week."

"Oh well he's just been very nice and helpful and I appreciate the lessons he's been giving me and…"

"You don't have to be cute darling. Tell me is he handsome and charming."

Fluttershy was blushing profusely at this point.

"Can we maybe talk about something else?"

Rainbow Dash Spoke up.

"Sure but just say yes or no, we're curious."

She was about to say no, but Pinkie Pie chimed in and saved her.

"I'll say, I remember seeing him when he was still working in bars and clubs they were all pretty good looking even the weird pinto one I knew they'd do well."

"Um Pinkie who are you talking about."

"The rock star of course."

"We weren't talking about a rock star we were talking about the amnesiac Fluttershy found."

"Oh that guy. What does he look like again?"

With that their conversation was terminated and a new one began. After an hour or so Fluttershy bid them ado and began to walk home the conversation they had had still burning in her mind.

"_He's not dangerous just a regular pony who needed help, but what was he doing in the forest he could have just escaped from prison or just robbed someone and I left him alone with my animals."_

For a moment she panicked and began to run home but she was able to calm herself.

"_No if he was going to cause trouble he would have done it already he's fine, but then there's the other question Rarity asked and her implication. I mean I suppose he's handsome and he is nice but he's only a friend someone who needed help so I helped him. And just because I like his guitar and he's good to talk to and he's good with my pets and he offered to teach me how to play and he has those eyes it doesn't mean I like him as more than a friend. I hope"_

She was getting close to her house when suddenly a loud noise emanated from her home that made her give a quiet scream, but it took only a second for her to recognize the singing of a guitar and another song that was new to her.

_I must've dreamed a thousand dreams  
Been haunted by a million screams  
But I can hear the marching feet  
They're moving into the street_

Now did you read the news today  
They say the danger's gone away  
But I can see the fire's still alight  
There burning into the night

There's too many men, too many people  
Making too many problems  
And not much love to go round  
Can't you see this is a land of confusion?

Well this is the world we live in  
And these are the hands we're given  
Use them and let's start trying  
To make it a place worth living in

Fluttershy opened the door to see Stills standing on an amp playing a windmill on his guitar with several of her pets standing around intently. He was completely lost in the song he was playing and didn't notice her presence until he finished then he looked at her smiled.

"I just remembered I'm really good."

**Land of Confusion by Genesis**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thumbs up to anyone who got my Keith Richards joke.**

"Why are we standing at a cliff sidethere's nothing here."

"Just look, half the cliff side gave way I bet it collapsed under him and he fell we've got to check the nearby town or look around the base for clues."

"There are three problems with your brilliant theory, first you're an idiot, second what are the realistic odds he was conveniently at this spot when the cliff gave way, and third he's a Pegasus even if he did fall he can fly."

"Well it wouldn't hurt to check the town down there."

"Come on do you really think he'd just go shut up in some Podunk town in the middle of nowhere, in fact now that I think about he probably just came back while we were looking we're wasting time here."

"I don't know Morrison he was pretty pissed when he left."

"You guys know McCready he doesn't stay angry long I'm sure he's back."

"Well I guess we can go back but I still think we should check."

"We're leaving."

"I didn't think you were that good, I mean I knew you were good, but I, I didn't think you were not that good but, oh I'm saying this wrong."

"It's alright I know what you mean besides, paraphrasing Scott Fitzgerald, if you respond to slight praises or critiques you're a third rate musician or first rate actor."

"Thank you, say do you think music had something to do with your life before you came here."

"I don't know if it did but I think it can."

He showed her an ad in the newspaper asking for a talented musician to perform at a new club that had recently opened in town.

"I'm going to be that musician, and I'm going to pay rent for as long as I have to stay here."

"Can you play the New Age, Dub Step, and Hip Hop they're looking for?"

"Not for a damn, but I'm going to change what they want played."

"I don't know if you can change any ponies mind."

"I'm not going to change their mind I'm just going to remind what they actually want to hear. People still want to listen to good music, despite how perverted the music industries become, they've just forgotten what it sounds like for the sake of commercialism. I'm going to remind them."

"I guess there's no harm trying."

The next day Stills brought his red Fender to the new club in question, Fluttershy came along to support him though she didn't think he needed it but she wanted to be there.

"Next audition please."

"Hello my name is Stills and I'm going to perform a slightly different genre than what was requested but I hope you'll bear with me."

The club owner rolled his eyes

"I'm going back 53 years with this one."

Immediately a classic rock and roll type sound emanated from his guitar in a way he made all his own. While listening you could see a fifties dance hall lighting up with the chords.

_Deep down in Louisiana close to New Orleans_

_Way back up in the woods among the Evergreens_

_There's still the log cabin made of earth and wood_

_Where lived a country boy named Johnny B. Goode_

_Who never ever learned to read or write so well_

_But he could play a guitar just like a ringing a bell_

_Go Go Go Johnny go go _

_Go Johnny go go_

_Go Johnny go go_

_Johnny B. Goode_

The song ended and the proprietor didn't say a word for several moments before asking Stills to play something else. He started in.

_Well I came upon a child of God_

_He was walking along the road_

_And I asked him tell me where are you going_

_This he told me_

_Said I'm going down to asgard land_

_Going to join in a rock and roll band_

_Gotta get back to the land made by the soulful_

_We are star dust_

_We are golden_

_We are billion year old Carbon_

_And we got to get ourselves back to the garden._

Once more the song ended and the owner didn't say a word, but he thanked Stills for auditioning an asked for a phone number with which to call if need be. After he walked off the stage Fluttershy surprise both herself and Stills hugging him and complimenting his performance. After she let go blushing very obviously she asked him.

"Why didn't he comment or say anything at all, it seemed like he wasn't happy."

"No he liked it he was just surprised at what he heard. I'll get the job I bet you, give it three days and I'll be working there."

**Three Weeks Later**

Early in the morning the phone began ringing incessantly in Fluttershy's home. It rang often now and usually it would just be ignored but she had already slept in and this served as a good alarm clock, so she got up out of bed and answered the phone.

"Hello, this is Fluttershy speaking, yes; yes he's here, yes."

While she was talking Stills rolled out of the bed and walked up behind her. He put his hooves around her waist and kissed the back of her neck causing her to giggle.

"Mr. Epstein is on the phone he wants to talk to you."

"I don't want to talk to him."

"He said it was important."

"Alright."

"_Yes this is Stills."_

"_Hey good to hear from you kid, I want to tell you about a recording deal I think I could get you."_

"_I keep telling you I don't want a big deal_ _I want to stay a local performer."_

"_You really want to play small gigs in a cow town the rest of your life."_

"_I want to enjoy playing music for the rest of my life."_

"_I could make you a fortune."_

"_I don't want a fortune."_

"_What are you not telling me kid? There something that is making you afraid of success it almost sounds like you don't want to get big. Why is that?_

"_Look it's nothing I'm just happy where I'm at."_

"_Just think about it kid."_

With that he hung up, and walked back over to Fluttershy who was sitting at the breakfast table he gave her a kiss and sat down.

"What was he calling about? Stills"

"Huh, oh just a couple of gigs to perform at."

"Alright."

He was staring out the window wishing he could forget.

**Okay so the events of the story are kind of out of sequence the next few chapters will explain what happened. I wasn't going to do it that way, but I like this better than my original Idea. Also Johnny B. Goode by Chuck Berry and Woodstock a song actually by Steve Stills. Please Review.**


	6. Chapter 6

**I habitually put something bolded at the top even though I have absolutely nothing to say. "**_**Shut up and write." **_**Which asshole said that "**_**The right half of your frontal lobe. You're boring me." **_**Fine I'll write the fucking story.**_** "No technically I'm writing it." **_**Then why the hell are you yelling at me? "You're the one with hands." Fuck you. "Technically you just said fuck me." I hate that asshole. "You mean you." Fuck!**

The club wasn't open for another couple hours, but Stills was there early to set up and rehearse. As he had predicted he got the job getting the call the next morning and the day after that he was getting ready to perform. The only support he had on stage was a caramel colored earth pony who had a very simple drum set beyond that it was just him his guitar and his voice. He wished he didn't have to sing his voice wasn't anything special but he hoped his guitar could make up for it.

"Sound check."

_For your love.  
For your love.  
For your love.  
I'd give you everything and more, and that's for sure.  
For your love.  
I'd bring you diamond rings and things right to your door.  
For your love._

To thrill you with delight,  
I'll give you diamonds bright.  
There'll be things that will excite,  
To make you dream of me at night._  
__For your love_.

"Alright I think we've got this right just need to tune up and we can perform."

With the stage set and a couple of hours to kill before the opening Still's fell back on his new favorite old pastime daydreaming. He thought about what he would perform and the praise he would receive but it made him somewhat sick. He began to entertained fantasies of performing in front of thousands in sold out arenas but this was distasteful. He begrudgingly recalled a reoccurring dream where he was sitting on a large bus with a guitar and someone or something was attempting to open the door and enter, wanting to forget this he thought about Fluttershy. He found that he thought about often always with a sense of appreciation and almost wonder. He found it odd that any pony would go out of their way to help him and offer so much assistance to a complete stranger to the point of sheltering him. She actively cared for so many creatures and gave so much of herself to care for them with almost no recompense. She was a wonderful combination of frailty and dedication, empathy and compassionate action all of which he had never seen in those around him or even in himself. It further fascinated him that everything he knew about himself was common knowledge to the both of them through this serendipitous occurrence she actual knew him better than he knew himself. Christ why did he think about her so often as if he were a love sick puppy it made him angry that the his clarity of thought that was so highly prized was being shattered, but God did it exhilarate him that he couldn't think just feel what exactly he hadn't the faintest clue. The place was beginning to gradually fill a few moments before he began to play Fluttershy and her friends entered and found a table once they did he picked up his guitar.

"Hello, I'm going do my best to entertain you with something you may never have heard or maybe you have."

His guitar started singing no wailing an almost alien sound that utterly silenced the talkative group then he began to sing the words and the instrument broke out into a powerful rhythm that held the audience.

_In the white room with black curtains in the station_

_Black roof curtains no gold pavements tire starlings_

_Silver horses branded moonbeams in your dark eyes_

_Gone like smiles on you leaving my contentment_

_I'll wait in this place where the sun never shines_

_Wait in the place where the shadows run from themselves_

A soaring guitar solo concluded the song and it was very quiet then very subtlely one pink mane Pegasus began quietly clapping while trying to hide her face. It was small but it spread quickly and there was an uproar of as much applause as could be mustered by a modest crowd. Stills gave a very visible smile and began again.

_I went down to the crossroads fell down on my knees_

_Down to the crossroads fell down on my knees_

_Asked the Lord above for mercy save me if you please_

The solo had an old time bluesy feel that may have come from one hundred years in the past but it was balanced by a rapid progression and modern musical techniques that took both genres of rock and blues to an elevated state.

"Hot damn Fluttershy ya said ya found this fella in the forest, I'd suspect ya kidnapped him off a stage 50 years ago."

"Ya why were you keeping him from us?" Rainbow Dash took a good look at Stills.

"Come to think of it I swear I've seen that guy before I just can't put my finger on it."

"I hope you all enjoyed and will come and listen again."

"Come on keep playing."

"That's all for tonight but I'll have some new songs tomorrow if you care to stop by."

He gave a courteous bow and disregarding the back stage exit picked up his instrument and walked through the crowd to the front exit. Once outside he spotted Fluttershy standing with a group of mares to the side and he made his way over.

"Hey Fluttershy and hello to you all."

"Uhm uh this is Stills the one who was just performing."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, you were excellent."

"Thanks it's just what I do, well not really but for the time being it is."

"How is your memory coming along anyhow?"

"Not well all I've recalled now is that I'm from Canterfornia and I used to idolize Hendrix."

"you know you look awfully familiar." Rainbow Dash wasn't the only one thinking so.

"I've actually heard that a lot here but no one has been able to identify me."

"Well you'll remember sooner or later."

"I certainly hope so."

Back at Fluttershy's cottage she and stills were sitting on her couch talking, a little bit about the show but not much.

"Would you mind if I asked you something?"

"Ask away."

"Why can you remember how to play guitar and songs you've heard and books you've read but you don't know who you are?"

"I guess…I guess it's because that's the stuff I wouldn't want to lose for anything."

"I don't understand."

"What does it matter what my name is I'm still me be I Sam or Bill or John, and my job that's got nothing to do with defining me. Only the things I love define me and I love my music I love literature all I've forgotten only holds superficial significance if any at all."

He was quite for a minute.

"I suppose I didn't really have much of a life though."

"Why do you say that." Her voice was full of concern and empathy.

"I Can't remember a single person from my life nothing beyond vague apparitions, and if I can't remember anyone that means I didn't have anyone who I care deeply about and that means no one really cared much for me and that's no way to live."

"I…I care about you."

He looked up at her and gave her his same sly grin she hugged him and he kissed her muzzle and began blatantly blushing before he leaned in again and kissed her lips.

**I've Still got some more elaborating to do but that's some explanation. Three Eric Clapton songs in this chapter one with the Yardbirds**_** For Your Love **_**and two with Cream **_**White Room **_**and **_**Crossroads. White Room**_** is one of my all-time favorite songs if you care to know.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Lots o'revelations. **_**"What did I tell you last chapter?" **_**Excuse me for a moment**

Stills woke up with sleep still heavy on his eyes he looked around the room Fluttershy had already gotten up for the morning and was probably on her morning stroll. He was thinking of the night before playing and talking with Fluttershy and when he kissed her. Oh God he kissed her, what was he thinking she was a friend who he was living with when he didn't even know who he was and he was stupid enough to kiss her. He had no idea how he would even speak to her after that what would she say to him? She'd probably ask him to leave leaving him homeless and depressed, but she wouldn't do something like that. Most likely there would just be an awkward silence that would become so unbearable he eventually pretend to have his memory back and leave on his own once again becoming homeless and depressed. Then again she may eagerly requite his affection but he didn't expect that to happen. All he could do was wait for her to come home and as if on cue she walked through the door noticing that he was awake stopped and looked at him.

"H..hi Fluttershy." For the first time he found he couldn't speak clearly to her.

"Oh, goodm…morning Stills." A brief silence that held the air for what could have been hours followed before Stills decide to simply open up the conversation.

"Hey I'd like to talk to you about last night."

"O…okay"

"You remember it was quiet and we were talking and I kissed you a couple of times."

"Yes"

"What are your thoughts about that?"

"Honestly I don't know." She really didn't know she felt strong affection towards him but was well aware of the obvious problems that were present. She was caught between telling him she only wanted to be friends and running over to embrace him. Because she couldn't decide what to do she left it to reason.

"_I haven't known him long only a couple of weeks, my knowledge of him is limited, he doesn't know his own identity, When he does remember who he is there could be serious conflicts between me and his real life, I don't have the time required for a special somepony."_

She looked at these hindrances and firmly made a decision. Without a moments more hesitation she ran over to him and wrapped her forelegs around his neck.

"I'm not sure if I love you but I feel something pretty close to it."

"Then I'll just have to make you sure then." And he kissed her and smiled.

Fluttershy spent a good ten minutes stumbling over words but she finally relayed her message that her couch couldn't be comfortable and he could sleep in her bed if he wanted to and it took him fifteen to passive aggressively agree to her offer. Most of the night he slept well but then his dream came back with a vengeance. He was sitting on a large bus his guitar in his hand, actually it wasn't his red Fender it was a blue Stratocaster that looked very familiar, outside he heard what sounded at first like cheers and clapping but came to resemble a loud buzzing of hornets and the screeching of crows. Once again something was trying to enter the bus but this time rather than banging on the door it simply turned the handle and three ponies entered. The first was a black unicorn with a white mane and upon seeing him Stills was filled with anger, he was followed by a fat grey Earth pony who made him feel disgusted, and closing out the trio was a green female Pegasus, very pretty, and she terrified him he wished all three would leave him be but her more than any of them he wanted to expel from his memory and never see again.

"C'mon kid it's time to go."

"Where? Where are we going?"

"You know where."

With that they grabbed his legs and were dragging him out of the bus into a blinding white light and he could hear himself yelling.

"No, no more just let me be I'm done with it all let me be."

At that moment he woke up, his heart was beating very fast and he was trying to both slow it down and remember who those ponies were and what he wanted to be done with. It was still dark and Fluttershy was asleep next to him when he saw her he let out a sigh and laid back down.

"_It doesn't matter who they were or where I've been or what I've done. All that matters is I'm where I want to be with who I want to be with doing what I want to do."_

He fell back to sleep and dreamed up one of his memories. He was sitting in a room by himself with the same blue Stratocaster _Comfortably Numb _was playing on the radio and he started playing along when the song ended he gave a very solemn sigh and said.

"This is the life ain't it Roger." He was occupied with this dream until he woke up.

_Hello is there anypony in there_

_Just nod if you can hear me_

_Is there anypony home_

_Relax I'll need some information first_

_Just the basic facts_

_Could you show me where it hurts_

After having that dream he figured performing the song might get it out of his head. The desperate wailing of his guitar at the end drove the house mad and he gave the obligatory smile.

"Thank you all I hope you're having a good time, now I'd like to play a song that's one of personnel favorites this is _Simple Man."_

He plucked the opening rift and suddenly felt a massive headache and he remembered that every time this song would play his mother would tell him to listen closely and then everything came back. He knew his name his career his band his music his fame and all at once it made him sick.

_Mama told me when I was young  
Come sit beside me, my only son  
And listen closely to what I say.  
And if you do this  
It'll help you some sunny day. _

His parents were both dead they died his senior year in high school to deal with the pain he played and wrote songs for hours on end he was devastated but that was when he got good._  
Oh, take your time... Don't live too fast,  
Troubles will come and they will pass. _

He paid for college jamming in bars with a few guys he had met there after several years of that they finally caught a break and signed a soul sucking record deal.

_You'll find a woman, yea yea, you'll find love,  
And don't forget son,  
There is someone up above._

He had an abhorrent girlfriend he couldn't get rid of and was discouraged in his spirituality for the sake of commercialism__

And be a simple, kind of man.  
Oh be something, you love and understand.  
Baby be a simple, kind of man.  
Oh, won't you do this for me son,  
If you can?

He was a whore to record company always travelling on tour or attending garbage parties just looking to be thrown a bone.__

Forget your lust, for the rich man's gold  
All that you need, is in your soul,  
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try.  
All that I want for you my son,  
Is to be satisfied.

He had money, fame, he was living the dream of legions young kids picking up their first instrument but he hated it all. It was killing him and it had been for years, he had always known that but tried to ignore it.__

Boy, don't you worry... you'll find yourself.  
Follow your heart, lord, and nothing else.  
And you can do this, oh baby, if you try.  
All that I want for you my son,  
Is to be satisfied.

But he didn't need to do it anymore he had an out and he could exploit it but he shivered at the thought of what it entailed.__

Baby be a simple, be a simple man.  
Oh be something, you love and understand.  
Baby be a simple, kind of man. 

He didn't hear the crowd he hadn't heard the song he played moments ago he was caught at a crossroad.

"Thank you, I'll be back in a moment."

He had an out he could be done with it all and have the life he wanted but to do that he had to lie for the rest of his life. No one could know who he was or else it would come crashing down on him no one could know, but what about Fluttershy. Could he tell her he was sure she'd keep the secret but what would she think of him knowing he was running away from his problems hiding from his life what would she say if she knew he had a mare friend who made his stomach twist with loathe. She would be hurt disappointed or the worst scenario ask him to leave he didn't want to risk that but he didn't want to lie to her. Fuck every pony else he didn't want to have to lie to her maybe he could just wait hold out on the truth for a little while and tell her when he was ready and not tell her everything just the important parts. He peeked out and saw her close to the front of the stage and his heart skipped a beat.

"I'll wait to tell her just a little while until I figure out what to say. Just a few days and I'll think of something just a few days."

"I told you we should have checked that town first."

"Yes fine you were right are you happy now."

"God it sounds good to hear you say that Morrison it only took you a month to admit it."

"No it took half a dozen stories of a light blue guitar playing Pegasus that came out of nowhere the same time we lost McCready and has been knocking down crowds every show to get me to admit we should check that town."

"Maybe we shouldn't go looking for him."

"What are you talking about Ginger?"

"If he's been gone for so long and hasn't even tried to contact us maybe he doesn't want to come back."

"That's stupid he's probably just taking a vacation, though I don't know why he'd go there."

"Well then won't he just come back eventually?"

"Yeah but we don't know how long that will be and we're going on tour next week we need him now."

"I still don't think we should go."

"Sorry Ginger but I'm calling our agent right now and I'm calling Beverley too she'll want to be there when we get him."

"You know he can't stand her."

"If he couldn't stand her why is she still around."

"You know the record company would crucify him if he dumped a big name actress."

"Now you're just being paranoid." And with that Morrison walked out.

"Do you really think he doesn't want to be found?"

"I don't know Emerson but I certainly hope Morri is right about this."

**Sorry that's it's been awhile I wasn't entirely sure what to write. Shit's going to hit the fan next chapter**_**. Comfortably Numb**_** by Pink Floyd and **_**Simple Man**_** by Lynyrd Skinner **


	8. Chapter 8

**Obligatory Message.**

Early in the morning the phone began ringing incessantly in Fluttershy's home. It rang often now and usually it would just be ignored but she had already slept in and this served as a good alarm clock, so she got up out of bed and answered the phone.

"Hello, this is Fluttershy speaking, yes; yes he's here, yes."

While she was talking Stills rolled out of the bed and walked up behind her. He put his hooves around her waist and kissed the back of her neck causing her to giggle.

"Mr. Epstein is on the phone he wants to talk to you."

"I don't want to talk to him."

"He said it was important."

"Alright."

"_Yes this is Stills."_

"_Hey good to hear from you kid, I want to tell you about a recording deal I think I could get you."_

"_I keep telling you I don't want a big deal_ _I want to stay a local performer."_

"_You really want to play small gigs in a cow town the rest of your life."_

"_I want to enjoy playing music for the rest of my life."_

"_I could make you a fortune."_

"_I don't want a fortune."_

"_What are you not telling me kid? There something that is making you afraid of success it almost sounds like you don't want to get big. Why is that?_

"_Look it's nothing I'm just happy where I'm at."_

"_Just think about it kid."_

With that he hung up, and walked back over to Fluttershy who was sitting at the breakfast table he gave her a kiss and sat down.

"What was he calling about? Stills"

"Huh, oh just a couple of gigs to perform at."

"Alright."

He was staring out the window wishing he could forget.

"Are you excited about your show tonight?"

"What was that?"

"Are you excited about the show tonight I hear most of the town ought to be there. I don't know how you stand up in front of so many ponies I'd be scared to death."

"You'd be surprised when you get up there and get lost in your music, then again it might actually kill you if you try."

"How?"

"You'd blush to death."

"Oh stop it."

"What it's cute. Say how's it coming on that last song I taught you?"

"Very good I really appreciate you helping me learn."

"Can I hear it?"

"Oh, well I don't know it's not that good and you're used to playing so well you'd think it was terrible."

"You don't do things terribly besides I'm easy to impress."

"O…okay but only if you sing along alright."

"Alright."

She struck a C chord and began to sing

_When I find myself in times of trouble_

_Mother Mary comes to me_

_Speaking words of wisdom let it be_

_And in my hour of darkness _

_She is standing right in front of me_

_Speaking words of wisdom let it be_

_Let it be let it be let it be oh let it be_

_Speaking words of wisdom let it be._

Stills, or McCready he didn't know what to think of himself as now, thought about his own mother. What would she say to him about what he was doing? She was always a stern moral compass and telling him it was his responsibility to be a stallion and part of that was facing his problems head on whatever the fallout might be. Instead he was hiding from his troubles behind a façade hoping his old life wouldn't catch up with him. Stills was the person he was meant to be but he couldn't rightly be Stills with McCready hanging on his back and he couldn't rightly abandon McCready because that who he was when it got right down to it. Not to mention abandoning McCready would be a cowardly and selfish maneuver throwing his past and everyone in it into the wind. He was confused he could no longer define himself but then there was Fluttershy who was someone and something he was certain about. She was a constant for him because whether he was Stills or whether he was McCready he still loved her and that's was all he knew was certain. He loved her and she loved Stills not McCready so he was Stills because he couldn't bear being McCready. Maybe he was ashamed of himself and maybe he felt a knife twist in his heart every time she called him Stills but it was better than the alternative. Better than her not loving him.

"You stopped singing."

"Sorry I just got sidetracked."

"That's been happening a lot recently and you've been stressed. Is there something wrong?"

"No you don't need to worry yourself."

"I can't help but worry if you have something disturbing you."

"I'm fine really."

"Okay but I'm here if you need to talk about anything." And she walked away.

"_I wish I could tell you anything."_

Stills was tuning up his guitar while the crowd was continuing to grow around the outdoor stage. Unlike before he had a full band backing him, though it wasn't anything too fancy, it reminded him of his previous life the part he actually loved. He hated the rock star life and the influences of fame but when he got and stage and his music made thousands of people happy and all is was doing was playing for his own enjoyment, it reminded him why he first started playing. He was going to start in five minutes so without further hesitation he walked out on stage amidst loud cheering and plugged his Fender into the large amp beside him and looked out at the crowd he couldn't help but smiling until a couple of ponies caught his eye and he had to grab the amp to keep his balance. About 50 meters away from him he saw Ginger and Entewhistle standing in the crowd then he saw Emerson just a few meters behind them he didn't want to look down but he forced himself to, standing in the front was Morrison his agent and that bitch of a marefriend Beverly. He dropped his guitar and flew off as fast as his wings would carry him. Morrison shouted from behind.

"Hey where are you goi…" but he was cut off when a cream colored Pegasus flew past him very fast.

"C'mon lets follow him."

"Oh God what am I going to do? They're here they're all here! I could try and lay low but they've already seen me they're probably following me now. I think I have to face the music."

"Stills?" He recoiled from surprise and Fluttershy in turn fell down with most of her face covered by her mane in a comical reenactment of their first encounter but he was far from laughing instead he silently gave her his hoof and helped her up.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine but why did you fly off like that?"

"Listen I…I need to talk to you and I don't know how much time I'll have to do it so here it goes. Fluttershy I know who I am."

"You do, well that's fantastic."

"No its not."

"What do you mean?"

"Have you ever heard of a guitar player by the name of McCready his band's awfully popular."

"It sounds familiar, oh yes about a year ago Rainbow Dash took me to one of their concerts it was much too loud but McCready was very go…That's you isn't it?"

"Yeah that's me."

"Well that's not necessarily a bad thing."

"Yes it is. I have to tell you I've known for a little while now a couple of weeks."

She was suddenly quiet

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I knew it would bust everything up. You wouldn't want me around anymore not when you knew I was a whore to the record company when you knew I had a stuck up bitch marefriend I couldn't get rid of when you knew I was just a puppet who tried to cut his strings and I knew that if anyone up in the tower found out they'd whisk me back to hell in a golden chariot. I was afraid you wouldn't love me I was afraid my old life would catch up with me so I lied and it killed me every time I did but was afraid to stop."

There was a long silence that Fluttershy finally broke.

"I would have still loved you you know."

"Yeah I do now. Do you still love me?"

"I don't know probably but I'm hurt right now I don't know when I'll forgive you and I don't know if I'll ever trust you."

"Would you like me to leave?"

"No I want you stay here. You know you never answered my question why did you fly off?"

"Because, my life caught with me." After he said that six ponies found them.

"McCready where have you been man we've missed you?"

"It's good to see you Ginger you too Emerson, Entewhistle."

"Hey it's good to see you what was with the flying off thing?"

"Can it Morri you and I both know what that was about." He turned to Beverly she was wearing the same bored haughty face that was far too familiar.

"And where the hell have you been, hanging around with some little whore this whole time." He replied very calmly amidst boiling blood.

"Now you shut your mouth it's a good thing I was taught not hit girls or I'd shut it for you. So you know I'd take one more second with her over a lifetime with you" Fluttershy was still standing a ways back but looked up at this last comment still she stood in place.

"Look kid I see you're not in the best of moods but now we've got to get going."

"I'm not going anywhere." Fluttershy took a step forward towards him but stopped there unsure of what she felt she needed to do next.

"What do you mean you're not going kid."

"I'm happy here I'm not going to leave."

"Alright I get you're playing the defiant little kid, what do I need to give you to make you come with us?"

"Handcuffs and a police cruiser."

"Good to see this cow town hasn't made you lose your wit now come on we're going."

"No were not." She was standing next to him now after slowly inching there with every short exchange of words.

"Alright I didn't want to do this but I'm pulling out your contract and you know what that means."

"Enlighten me."

"If you don't come with me it with in my legal rights to either drag you back or throw your ass in jail do you understand me."

"Alright do as you will." He hadn't noticed the two large grips that had helped set up the stage in Ponyville behind him as he was fixated on the crowd in front he hadn't noticed them until he felt the solid thump against the back of his head and lost consciousness.

"I wonder how much memory he'll lose this time doesn't really matter there's only one part of brain I care about." Fluttershy finally spoke up with as heartfelt a plea as she could give.

"You can't do this you can't take him from me."

"Legally I can and I am, but don't worry you can see him again just buy a concert ticket."

"Boss this isn't right he's our friend."

"Well isn't that cute if you're such good friends why don't we knock you out too and let you ride with him. I'm telling the four of you right now if you try to come back to this town or cause me any trouble at all I will put you in jail and I will end your career got it."

Fluttershy could only watch as he left her life similarly to the way he entered it.

**Heads up if you want to know how one of these songs is played just ask and I'll post it in the next chapter. Also I'm debating between a really sad ending and one that isn't sad I might just write both but still tell me which one would be preferred. **


	9. Chapter 9

**Had a new idea so the ending is being postponed a few chapters**

"Dude you've got to snap out of this it isn't healthy."

Morrison was pleading with his friend for the third time that week begging him to return to normal but it was having no effect. The light blue Pegasus in front of him was tearing at the seams and had reached of level of dilapidation that no one had expected.

"I'll snap out of it when I'm ready to fucking snap out of it until then piss off."

He grabbed the nearby flask and was preparing to take a swig but Morrison knocked it out of his hand.

"Cut it out! You never drank before this and know look at you, you smell like alcohol you haven't bathed in days and haven't shaved in much longer you'll sit in the studio for days and we just hear bitter screeching coming from your guitar it's like you don't want to live anymore."

"I don't really see why I have to when I'm just an extremely talented dancing monkey. I figure I'll die when God sees fit but I'll try and speed up the process."

At that he pulled out a second flask and took a swig.

"When you say that just think about all the people who will miss you when you're gone."

"I think of all one of them all the time."

Morrison quit on this endeavor and regrouped with his band mates who were waiting eagerly.

"How'd it go?"

"Terribly, I really think he wants to die I just wish I could help him."

"That's a new trend."

"Alright so I was being a…"

"An ass."

"I was going to say jerk."

"I was going to say that you haven't showed any concern for him until now."

"Now you stop there. McCready's like my brother I've known him since high school I was with him when he heard his parents died and I've always had his back."

"Well right now there's only one person who can help him and I don't think she's up for it."

Twilight Sparkle was reading the entertainment column of the newspaper hoping to catch a word on Stills or McCready as he would be referred to as. When Fluttershy's friends heard of what happened the reactions were mixed Rainbow Dash and Rarity were indignant that he would lie like that Pinkie Pie cried and Twilight and Apple Jack simply tried to console Fluttershy. Twilight understood why he did it and if any felt sympathy for him and his situation but her only objective was to comfort Fluttershy and if that required calling him a loser that she ought to get over she would do it or if require her saying he still cared about her but it just couldn't work out she's do it. Since he left about three or four weeks ago all sort of wild speculation popped up everything from an extended vacation to, accurately, proposing amnesia only one story mentioned Fluttershy's existence and it went on to say an obsessive fan kidnapped him it made her sick but the lack of attention was probably best for Fluttershy. Rainbow Dash was taking Fluttershy to see a concert in Canterlot that night actually to try and help her get her mind off of McCready, Rainbow didn't really care about the main act but she was excited about the opening performance some new band, Twilight didn't know if a concert was the best place for Fluttershy to forget McCready but it couldn't do any more harm than was already done. Fluttershy cried a lot now and was somehow more reserved than usual her friends had to visit her in order to see her and when they did there was a lot of crying and comforting. She had callouses from playing her guitar with such frequency it was suggested she get rid of it because it reminded her of McCready but she insisted it helped her find comfort so she kept on playing Twilight supported whatever might help her. She just wanted her friend back more than anything when Fluttershy was like this a light for a whole lot of people was gone.

_So, so you think you could tell_

_Heaven from hell_

_Blue sky's from pain_

_Could you tell a green field_

_From a cold steel rail_

_A smile from a veil_

_Do you think you could tell?_

"You've been playing that song for three hours aren't you getting tired?"

"I'm expressing my inner turmoil through the most blatantly obvious song I could think of."

"Okay maybe I can't get you to snap out of this but for Christ's sake at least try to be coherent human being."

"A what?"

"I only said you need to be coherent."

"Maybe I have been drinking too much."

"Fluttershy we need to go if we're going to make it on time."

She was playing her guitar again and ordinarily Rainbow Dash wouldn't rush her but they were in a hurry and she was playing the same song again.

_How I wish _

_How I wish you were here_

_We're just two lost souls_

_Swimming through a fish bowl_

_Year after year_

_Running over the same old ground_

_Or have we found _

_The same old fears_

_Wish you were here_

The song was appropriate but there are only so many times you can hear it.

"Alright I'm ready to go thank you again for bringing me along."

"No sweat I had an extra ticket and I figured you could use it."

"You're on in five."

"Are you going to be okay to play?"

"Hey Keith Richards didn't play a concert sober for almost seven years."

"Wait are you drunk!"

"No, I just wanted to give you a scare."

"I told you that band was awesome." She was referring to the opening act.

"Well they were uhm loud."

"I know right."

"Who did you say was the main act?"

"I can't really remember I just came to hear the opening anyway we'll see in a second."

There were some excessive special effect antics to try and create atmosphere or something like that and the band came on stage. When the smoke cleared and they became visible Fluttershy gasped immensely Stills or McCready as he was popularly known was on stage but this surprised her far less than his appearance he didn't look like the same pony. He usually clean cut mane was ragged he hadn't shaved for some time he was thinner than before he had an utterly defeated look on his face and his bright eyes had entirely lost their glow he had one hoof in the grave and Fluttershy knew it. She wanted to run out but couldn't make herself stop looking his way.

"Alright we're going to start with."

"Hey I'd like to change the plan a little."

Morrison whispered away from the microphone

"McCready what are you doing?"

"Just follow my lead."

"I want to start with classic that I put a little flair on."

He looked back at his band mates.

"Just try and keep up."

He started playing in a standard fashion and took up the lyrics himself

_Sheets of Empty Canvass_

_Untouched sheets of clay_

_Lay spread out before me_

_As her body once did yeah_

_All five horizons revolved around her soul_

_As the Earth to the sun_

_Now the air I taste and I breathe_

_Has taken a turn._

It was when he reached the chorus that he broke from the rhythm and started playing a fast disconcerted jigsaw of tune that bordered on being painful to hear but was impossible to stop listening to. It was fast and powerful to the point where his band couldn't keep pace Ginger eventually set down his drumsticks Entewhistle stopped playing bass Emerson had hopped off his keyboard and was still playing the rhythm guitar trying to keep some semblance of the original song but he was being drowned out and McCready's guitar kept crying.

_All I ever taught her was Everything_

_I know she gave me all that she wore_

_And now my bitter hands _

_Shape beneath the clouds_

_Of what was everything_

_All the bitter sounds_

_All been washed in black_

_Tattooed everything._

Fluttershy was felt tears run down her face but she wasn't crying not yet. The audience was quiet though they wouldn't have been heard anyhow.

_All the twisted thoughts they spin_

_Round my head _

_I'm spinning oh I'm spinning_

_How quick the sun can drop away_

_And now my bitter hands cradle broken glass_

_Of what was everything_

_All the bitter sounds all been washed in black_

_Tattooed everything_

_All the love gone bad _

_Turned my world to black_

_Tattooed all I see_

_All that I am _

_All I'll be yeah._

Now she was crying but it couldn't be heard not even by herself.

_I know someday you'll have a beautiful life_

_I know you'll be the sun_

_In somebody else's sky_

_But why, why, why, couldn't it be_

_Couldn't it be mine._

When he finished playing all but two ponies in the audience exploded with cheering and he had to sit down on his amp. His callouses wore away and his hoof was bleeding and his guitar strings were warm to the touch. He looked and froze when he saw Fluttershy fly out of her seat and towards the exit with Rainbow Dash trailing her.

"Hey are you okay, that was really something you just did."

"No I'm not okay. I don't think I can play anymore tonight."

"Fluttershy wait up I'm sorry I didn't know who it was."

But she had already left.

**So How about that chapter a little bit sadder. Black by Pearl Jam and Wish you were here by Pink Floyd. Please review.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Sorry it's been awhile I haven't really had any ideas.**

Rainbow Dash chased after her friend who, at the conclusion of the song, flew off at a surprisingly fast speed.

"What was I thinking? How did I not remember who was performing tonight? Fluttershy's going to be pissed. Well as close to pissed as she can get."

Rainbow Dash finally caught up with her just outside of the arena. She was sitting under a streetlamp looking at nothing in particular; Rainbow had expected to find her crying but Fluttershy remained surprisingly stoic.

"Fluttershy, I'm sorry I forgot who it was honestly. Please don't be mad."

"Did you get see him Rainbow? All the light was gone from his face, as if the person I loved had died and his body was trying to catch up."

"It's just been hard on him; he cared about you a lot and probably still does."

"Did I do that to him?"

"You?"

"Is it my fault he wants to die?"

"No of course not, You're the only reason he wanted to live in the first place."

"McCready are you in there?"

After his opening performance McCready related his inability to continue playing and promptly passed out backstage. After the show he was once again confronted by Morrison.

"I thought you said you were sober!"

"I am sober I just wasn't fir to perform tonight."

"What happened this time? You felt sorry for yourself? You needed a hug? You needed to lament how the world was fucking unfair to you all because you can't get over some two bit ho you only knew for a month?"

Morrison had about 20 pounds on McCready, but after his last comment he was on the ground seeing stars.

"Fuck. Look I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you."

"That's alright I was looking for you to man up."

"Alright I admit it I've been a gutless bum, a pissed off coward who's been hiding behind a bottle because I can't face the facts."

"What facts."

"That she's gone, that my ship has sailed, that I'm stuck on a crazy fucking loop and the only way off is a one way ticket on the Smith and Wesson express."

"You really have given up. God, you never should have met this girl."

"No I should have and I needed to, and even though I'm going crazy I know it was the best thing that happened in my life. Ever since I started earning my bread through entertaining I've been a fucking zombie. I've chased the dollar doing whatever I was told and whether I didn't know it or simply ignored it I was fucking miserable. You know the song _House of the Rising Sun_? That's where I've been It's my goddam biography and you aren't able to just escape it. I did though I found a way out and I took advantage of it and I was never happier, but you can't escape this life it caught me and I ended up hurting the person I love the most. So that's what's killing me, I miss Fluttershy, I'd die to have her back, but all I can do now is just hurt her more.

"McCready I…I don't know what…"

But he was cut off when McCready started playing.

_No one knows what it's like_

_To be the bad man to be the sad man_

_Behind blue eyes_

_No one knows what it's like_

_To be hated to be faded _

_To telling only lies_

_But my dreams they aren't as empty_

_As my conscious seems to be_

_I have hours only lonely_

_My love is vengeance_

_That's never free_

"For fuck sake, why don't you just go talk to Fluttershy?"

"You think I haven't thought of doing that?"

"Well why haven't you?"

"What I'm I supposed to say? Sorry I lied about my identity, but don't worry I became a suicidal drunk after I left. How have you been? I'm stuck in the mud and sinking I'm not going to drag her down too It isn't worth hurting her."

"You realize that by just waiting around to die you're still hurting her."

"It's better than just coming and going building her up to tear her down. She'll forget me eventually that's what's best for her."

"I'm not so sure about that."

Fluttershy trotted towards her door responding to the knocking. It had been two months since Stills left; two months and she still couldn't forget him. She went about her life the same as always but in a perpetual haze of sadness that was only perceptible by her close friends. Above all the image of him being broken on the stage couldn't be purged from her memory, and it killed her to think that would be her last image of him. She had lost the habit of asking who was at the door whenever someone was there shortly after he had left. This was to entertain a sad fantasy she had at first that when she opened the door Stills would be there on his knees asking for forgiveness and after few minutes of enjoying his groveling she wrap him up in a big kiss, but this never happened. Instead she opened the door and saw Morrison standing on the other side.

"Y..you. W…what are you doing here?"

"We all need to talk to you."

"All?"

It was then she noticed Emerson, Entewhistle, and Ginger standing behind him two of the were carrying a large sack that looked full.

"What do you want?"

"I don't know if you knew but McCready has essentially been waiting to die ever since he left, and we know that the only way to snap him out of it was to you again."

"Where is he?"

"He was afraid that his coming back would only hurt you so we couldn't get him to come."

"Then why are you here?"

"We made him come anyway."

"What?"

They proceeded to dump the bags contents on her floor and out came a groaning light blue Pegasus with a lump on the back of his head. Once he was out they quickly left a slammed the door behind them. He began to open his eyes giving them a second to adjust while he dealt with the ringing in his ears. When his vision came to the first thing he saw was Fluttershy standing over him looking utterly surprised.

"Uh…hey."

**It was surprisingly hard to fit a song from The Who in here. Again sorry it's been so long my brains been on vacation the past few weeks and I can't think of ideas without it. I'll have the next chapter out within a week. Probably. Please review. **


	11. Chapter 11

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**I'm going to try really hard not to make this overly sappy.**

"Uh…hey"

"S…stills?"

It was undoubtedly him. He had cleaned up since she had seen last him at the concert but he was still thin; and she wondered if he had cleaned himself up or if his friends had made him.

"I…can't believe you're actually here."

"Neither can I. Uhm… how have you been?"

"Me oh uh fine."

She had the same audibility as the first time he met her and he couldn't help but smile a little. The facial contortion had become so alien to him it actually made his face sore.

"Look I know I've had to do this for some time I just wasn't sure how I was going to. I didn't expect it to be ridding unconscious in a sack but whatever it takes right?"

The corners of her mouth turned up and it did him good, it gave him the motivation to speak up.

"I guess the only way to start this is by saying I'm sorry for everything that's happened. I know there's a lot to apologize about and I can't really cover in two words but I hope for right now I'm sorry will do. I can't condone my own actions but maybe I could try to at least explain them if you'd be willing to listen."

She was afraid to answer yes or no but decided to take a chance.

"I'll listen."

"Thank You. For most of my life I've been confused. I could never find which way was up or down or what was real, I'd chase answers like a dog chases their tail, I'd have a new philosophy to follow every week, and there were only a few core values I could hold dear to. In other words I was your typical youth wandering through a teenage wasteland* and when my parents died I went into a tail spin, but no matter what I had my music, and when I strummed my guitar or sat down at our old piano things made sense to me and the world and everyone in it seemed right in perfect incongruity. Music made me free, I could do anything, when I played, the feeling, I could only compare it to an addict shooting up heroin for the first time but without ever having to come down. Then I became a success and all the confusion came back and I was just in a black hole to numb to care even my guitar couldn't breathe life into me anymore I was too far gone. But when I met you, it felt like the first chord I ever struck, you sent me back to that place where everything was right and things were clear the way music use to. You made me enjoy playing again and you…you made me feel alive again. I didn't want to lose that I didn't want to go back into the void so I lied, I wish to god I hadn't but I did. Now I realize how selfish I was. I loved you but I loved myself more so I risked hurting you so I wouldn't get lost again. All I can say now is that I'm sorry and I hope someday you could find a way to forgive me."

Everything was quiet for several minutes, Fluttershy's expression was blank and McCready wondered if maybe everything that would be said had been.

"I guess I'll leave now…"

"Do you remember when I told you about how I got my Cutie Mark?"

"Yeah you fell off the cloud during the race, and some butterflies caught you and when you came to the ground you realized how much you loved nature. Then after the Rain Boom you discovered your talent for working with animals."

"I always loved the beauty of nature. Not because it was flashy or spectacular but because it was simple and honest. It didn't try to be beautiful it simply was and there was. There is so much depth and wonder in it for no other reason than that it simply exists. It simply exists It is simply beautiful and there is nothing else like it I thought. But when I met you when I heard you play that first time I found that same simple beauty in you. In you it was just there you could make something so beautiful out of thin air for no other reason than you simply could. It wasn't for anyone it wasn't even for yourself, but with your guitar you made something beautiful for the sake of creating something beautiful and that was what made me love you…why I still love you."

"Do you remember the first song I played for you?"

"Of course."

"Do you remember my favorite line?"

"Yes it was the same as mine."

"I wish I was the verb to trust and never let you down."

"I don't know why it's my favorite, but it always gets me."

"You know, I used to like that line because I thought it sounded so poetic and I thought it was a nice sentiment. It was also the only pickup line I ever used on you."

Fluttershy blushed and smiled thinking about it.

"I only recently started thinking about what that really means. It means I'll hold you up whenever you fall, be the crutch you stand on be the person who you'll never have to say goodbye to when the world turned on its head you'll still be on solid ground because you have them. I thought about what all that meant and I realized that that was what you had been for me and that was what I wanted to be and what I needed to be for you and I hope that you would maybe let me be."

Fluttershy didn't say a word but started walking as if she was moving towards the door, but she quickly turned and wrapped her forelegs around his neck and kissed him for a very long time and when they broke she began to cry loudly.

"Yes I forgive you I do and I want you to come back."

He gave her the lopsided grin she loved so much and whispered in her ear.

"Thanks, now I have time to figure out a more appropriate way to apologize."

Her eyes were slightly drier but she soon developed a worried look.

"But what are you going to do about your boss and your contract."

"I think I might have a plan."

**Okay first off, I know I said within a week, but my internet crashed there for about three weeks so I haven't had a chance to post.**

**I lied I have no plan for how he's going to get out of it but I'll think of something eventually. Yes it was sappy but I hope it wasn't to terribly sappy. As always please rate and review.**

***I used the most recognizable line from the Who song in context but the actual name of the song is Baba O'Reily. Most of you know that but I was just clarifying. It pisses me off when people call it Teenage Wasteland.**


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